Sometimes you have days where you feel ‘off’ for no particular reason that you can put your finger on – today was one of them.
Perhaps it is the hot weather – this sticky and uncomfortable state making me feel constantly headachy and lethargic or maybe it is being in this place of temporary suspension waiting for the ending of one chapter but not able to begin the next.
My replacement started at work yesterday and there is a lot to show her so it is quite exhausting – but she is very nice and had I been staying on I am sure we would have got along just fine.
I am also aware that coming up soon on the calendar are a few ‘memorable’ dates – each one of them evidence that life speeds ahead whether or not you are enjoying it, doing what you want to do or otherwise.
- July 19th – my 64th birthday – yikes really?
- July 30th – my eldest daughters 2nd wedding anniversary – already?
- July 31st – our 42nd wedding anniversary and the day I leave my job
- August 1st – Little L (my granddaughter’s) 4th birthday – growing up fast now.
- August 16th – this would have been my mum and dad’s 70th wedding anniversary if dad had still been alive but we will still mark the occasion with my mum in some way.
A lot of celebrations, maybe commiseration, a lot of memories, a lot of years and it does leave you wondering where did all that time go – have we become what we wanted or hoped to be?
As I am about to venture into this unknown territory soon of being job less (through choice) am I going to cope but more worrying am I going to fulfil all those things I once dreamed of doing. If I have things still left to do then I need to get on with them quickly as I have more life behind me now than in front.
I have been so busy recently that I have not given much thought to what I will do, less so to the financial implications of living on one state pension and our savings until I can claim my own in 2 years’ time.
Already our time is being booked out to helping:- decorating for our elder daughter, child minding our granddaughter for our younger daughter during the summer holidays and also granny minding for my mum whilst my sister is away. We have also booked the man to come to sort out the rendering of the upper part of our house.
Looks like it will be September then before we can draw breath! This doesn’t sound like a ‘retirement’ to me.