Tag: shopping

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dear diary ~ temptations and remembrance….

It was a lovely day on Tuesday, it is our regular shopping day at Sainsbury’s and normally we would pick up my dear friend K to take her with us.  K will be 90 next year and unfortunately has a terminal illness, doesn’t walk easily now without a walker or supermarket trolley to hang onto, and has limited vision. 

Sadly, K lost her partner suddenly on this day last year after having a major bowel operation and this left her with no means of getting to the shops or anywhere else on her own other than the local Access bus which she books for a Thursday, mainly to get her out of the house. 

On every second Tuesday in the month K has lunch with friends and it gives us time to shop further afield so we went over to John Lewis in Cheadle to return a roller blind and swap it for a wider one for the kitchen window. Sainsbury’s is right next door so we could kill two birds with one stone.

I didn’t really want any window covering at my kitchen window but in the summer the afternoon sun is blinding (no pun intended) and I spend my time cooking with a squint.  John Lewis do a plain blind that is sheer in their cheaper Anyday range and unlike the blackout blinds we have at the bedroom windows this allows the light to filter through but blocks out the strong sun……perfect….or will be when DH gets it fitted!  I am sure it is on his list.

I am not sure why, but I fell in love with some decorative gold wine glasses on display which would decorate my Christmas table rather well.  I am not usually a sparkly person (I leave that to my sister) but they just ooze Christmas and I think I will be sneaking them onto my Christmas list.  Even though DH was finding it difficult to separate me from them he would not think to buy them for me without a little prompt (is it a man thing?)

They are not cheap though at £24 for two (well not for me) so I would be limited to 4 of them without breaking the bank but they do have matching tumblers which are a little cheaper.  Ironically I do not drink wine but I would certainly pour my elderflower sparkling grape juice into one.

It is lethal for me going to John Lewis it might be the only time I would ever wish to be a millionaire and like Nigella Lawson it is always for the homewares not particularly the clothes. And if any JL staff are reading I do love their customer service.

I saw a pillowcase as we walked through John Lewis in Cheltenham recently and it was just the colour that I was looking for to paint a bamboo wood Ikea dressing table and matching bedside table that we bought ages ago in the bargain basement section.  I thought I could take the pillowcase and have it colour matched but once we got home we never got to do that and my 28 days return limit were almost up so I was going to take it back for a refund; before I did we wandered round to the paint and wallpaper section of JL and found that Little Greene paint do the exact same colour called Bone China Blue in a tester pot too so I can test out the colour on the wood. I just love the name of the colour it definitely swayed me it was the right one to choose.

The tester pot alone was £5.75 (where do they get their prices from?) but needs must and I do need to get this furniture painted.

Before Christmas.

If I can.

I decided that I loved the pillowcase so much that rather than returning it I bought another to match and they will go perfectly well with a printed duvet cover I have for the summer as well as the painted furniture.

That wasn’t the end of the temptations though…. I passed reluctantly on all the Christmas decorations, lights, tableware and suchlike but then found myself in Waterstones….a new addition inside John Lewis.  Looking at the double bookcase of best sellers in non-fiction it would appear that the vast majority of us have a problem with life at the moment and in particular are searching for something comforting (Hygge) or a reason for living ( Ikigai) or beauty and simplicity (Wabi Sabi) and that Zen way of life.

Well yes, I believe I might be searching for all those.  When I think back to my grandparents I could honestly say they had little money but oh how content they were with life and what they had – even during hard times and how homely and simple everything seemed.

I gave way and was tempted to a book in this section, ‘The Get Things Done Book’ – most apt at the present time – I am always looking for better ways to manage my life – when or if I find this elusive balance to my life I will let you know.  Meanwhile, I will press on with my own trial and error exploration and at the moment it is my idea of a three item project list to get through these never ending half finished jobs that surround and irritate me.

So yesterday I managed two tasks from my list of three – I booked the hotel for Christmas Eve and Christmas day near to mum’s apartment.  It is also close to my younger daughter in Thirsk.  As a family we have no idea what we might be doing yet for Christmas – only two people (daughter and sister) have houses big enough to accommodate us all and they have to have a downstairs toilet for mum and not be far away to get her there.  Mostly, our Christmas destination will depend on just how fit my mum is by Christmas day – it may only be weeks away but mum’s condition could worsen in that short time.  There is only 3 months now until she is 100.

As I mentioned above I managed two of the items on my list but the sewing of the greenhouse shading had to roll over to today and now it has to roll over again to tomorrow as I will spend my afternoon with my friend K having a cup of tea and a chat remembering her lovely partner.

People are much more important than my tasks.

As always thank you for your lovely comments, ideas, well wishes and advice….all gratefully received. x

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dear diary ~ mellow autumn, slow and easy…

I am gradually easing myself into this new season – a time to slow down and reflect.

For me it is a new season in my life too, no escaping anymore up to our little cottage in Scotland and spending hours working in the garden, but rejuvinating at the same time. It is just a year since we said goodbye and I am just starting to get a hold on my new normal, implementing a few changes here and there.

You might think as I did that we would have more time on our hands to do other things, but sadly…. no, this hasn’t turned out to be the case. With both daughters moving house one after the other we have been providing help with unpacking, sorting, decorating, gardening and childcare and my dear old mum has certainly entered a new chapter in her life.

Her short term memory is increasingly short term and living with the constant phone calls she makes to me through the day asking me the same question over and over ‘Do I know when the carers are coming in’ is frustrating but I need to keep patient and remember how frightening this condition is for her and how important routine and stability are to manage this condition. I know it will only get worse so I have to get better at handling the situation for my own sanity.

The carers are finding it hard to cope with her too so I know it is not just me feeling frustrated. Being almost 100 and still able to reside in your own home is such an achievement but also such a challenge. My family all agree that going inton a care home might not be that far away but at present she has almost 4 hours of undivided attention from the carers during the day – there is no way she will get that in a care home. During her brief spell in one 2 years ago she was lucky to have 5 minutes attendance from the overworked carers looking after her and she went downhill through lack of contact. I know from comments I receive that I am not alone in this situation and it helps to know that, it really does.

As any change can be difficult I am going slowly with the season and trying a bit of self care, carving out some time to do something just for me each week and alongside this I have a new determination to resolve some of the ongoing projects that are in limbo and constantly on my mind as no matter which way I turn I see unfinished jobs all around me.

I decided to sort my rather long project list into something more manageable, breaking down the more lengthy and involved projects into attainable tasks. I have now grouped these into short lists of three and I aim to complete the three over a week – Kanban style.

This week my 3 projects are:

  • Book a fully refundable hotel room for Christmas at the Premier Inn close to mum’s apartment.
  • Return a roller blind to John Lewis and buy a wider one, also buy a second pillowslip and a tester pot of the Little Greene paint.
  • Finally sew a casing on the edge of the greenhouse shading net so I can get it off the mending pile and pack it away ready for next year. (This task should have been done at the start of summer, but like most of my tasks got deferred).

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At the same time I am gearing up a notch to prepare myself for the next big event looming on the horizon ocassionally flicking through pages of magazines finding inspiration for making a few Christmas crafts and hoping at the same time that I will find the time to do them. I have found from experience that starting early is key to avoiding the almost unavoidable pressure that can be generated these days – gone are the days when Christmas could be organised the week or two before; I have learnt that even the simplest of Christmasses require a lot of planning to make them seem…..well simple.

You can’t help but notice that the Christmas magazines are plentiful and already on display in every supermarket and one or two have leapt into my shopping trolley lately, but they are a treat (call it part of my self care) as I decided at the beginning of the year not to renew the Country Living magazine I subscribed to. The décor featured currently is not really to my taste or the style of house we live in and the recipes, although the photography is really lovely and makes the food very tempting, they are often quite complicated or require some unusual ingredients or are decidedly not very vegetarian so I was getting very few ideas from them.

Instead, I switched to buying the seasonal issues of Country Living – Spring, Summer, Autumn and Christmas as quite often the features in these are pulled from past issues. I do tend to keep these seasonal issues to refer to each year and actually find them more inspiring than their monthly magazines – although I did sign up for the offer of 5 issues for £5 in August as £1 an issue is too good to miss and it will include the December issue.

A lovely little magazine for easy recipes and ideas for using up leftovers is the free Tesco magazine which my daughter passes on to me. Ironically, all these magazines are piling up now waiting to be read.

To add to my growing little stash two welcome packages arrived this week – I ordered the final issue of 91 magazine a while ago; I do admire these people who manage to self publish their own individual magazines and sadly, although I didn’t buy many copies, I will miss this one.

The other package was the 6 monthly little pamphlet produced by Persephone books that keeps you updated with details of any new titles and excerpts from some of their books in print, it came with the little red Victory postcard too, presumably a wartime slogan.

I have a passion for the Persephone books – I am working my way through many of them and there is something very appealing about their plain smooth grey covers opening up to those glorious prints hidden away inside.

I am patiently waiting for Christmas now when I know DH will ‘surprise’ me with a couple of new Persephone books to read…… meanwhile, I content myself with rereading one or two old favourites from my bookshelves. 

The one by my bedside that I currently fall asleep with after a chapter or two is The Fortnight in September by R C Sherriff,  a day by day account of a family’s two week holiday repeated every year in Bognor – a very typical British seaside holiday and very reminiscent of our own family holiday in Scarborough.  It has a nice leisurely pace very conducive for sleep and a glimpse into the ordinariness of their everyday lives.

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I had a bit of an unintentional spending session last Saturday – I say session, rather than spree, as I spent more than I thought but not more than was affordable.  After going to Mount Grace Priory we called in nearby Northallerton and I took Little L and Sweetie to The Works to treat them to one or two craft items to keep them busy in half term.

I chose the pack of spooky balloons to decorate along with the make your own pumpkin paper lantern and then let the girls have a free choice of something they would like to do – and what a mistake that was…I should have known better – whilst the display had some lovely laser cut wooden lanterns to paint or strings of bunting to colour….what did they choose….the most gruesome and hideous plaster figurines to paint that came at a gruesome price!

Let that be a lesson to myself not to take them with me to buy Halloween crafts.

I consoled myself with a few cute little Christmas bits that I have no doubt I or the children will create something Christmassy with.

Taking a short cut through the Yorkshire Trading Company I noticed this twiggy wreath at a very reasonable price. All I need now is the time to develop all the ideas I have floating around in my head.

But it won’t be today as DH and I will be out and about taking garden rubbish from my daughter’s garden to the tip and then another go at that bathroom.

Take care everyone, back soon xx

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dear diary ~ a few days down memory lane

Our visit to Cheltenham last week and the long awaited trip down memory lane was such a wonderful experience. Sometimes, no matter how good the memories of times gone by are you know you just cannot go back it will never be the same. As we wandered around reliving memories of such carefree days it did make us yearn for those old days, those simple days…. but you cannot freeze yourself in the past.

There were moments when I felt I would love to live there again – the Regency architecture so light and elegant at the side of our heavy Victorian gothic style here in the north, the variety of shops and the substantial number of parks and open spaces around and within the town are so inviting. To us, coming from a part of the north that is economically challenged the differences were very noticeable – the whole place oozed wealth and with that wealth comes well appointed properties on leafy streets, with well manicured parks and immaculately dressed and very stylish trim ladies, and hardly any sign of the slobby tracky bottoms, tattoo parlours or charity shops which litter northern towns (that is not a criticsm but merely an observation).

We settled ourselves into the beautiful apartment on Monday teatime then immediately went for a stroll around heading towards the street we moved to just off the high street during my second year.

All that remains are the street signs Grosvenor Terrace and the little alleyway at the lower end. All the houses are gone and replaced with a horror of a multi – storey car park, which my camera refused to take a picture of. And that was another observation – the amount of cars now, so many that they have numerous car parks that were not required back in the 70’s…most people just walked as it is not a large town.

Walking back along the High Street we came to the jewellers shop where we bought my engagement ring in 1975 at a grand cost of £28. This was the shop front in 2018 it looked just the same as the day we bought the ring!

And now – this is what we found – completely empty…but I do still have the ring.

We woke on Tuesday to a gloriously sunny and dry day and we finally arrived at our destination Holst Victorian House museum. For those who don’t know Gustav Holst was a composer who is best known for his famous seven movement orchestral suite The Planets and of which’ I vow to thee, my country’ (a poem by Sir Cecil Spring Rice) was set to music taken and adapted from the Jupiter suite. He also composed the hymn tune called Cranham for the poem ‘In the bleak miswinter’ by Christina Rosetti which earned the title of a Christmas Carol when published in 1872.

Gustav was born in this modest Regency terraced house in Cheltenham in 1874 to parents Aldolph and Clara Holst. His younger brother was born in 1876 and sadly Clara died shortly after and they left the house to live in Vittoria Walk in 1882.

I was met and given a wonderfully warm welcome by Laura, the curator of this museum, and one of the local student volunteers. It was through Laura that DH and I made this visit; we had been considering a trip for goodness knows how many years but never quite made it. The purpose of our visit was to view the bedroom in the Holst house that has been temporarily changed (as far as possible) into that of a 1970’s fashion student as part of acknowledging the final residents of this famous house, the Garlicks, who rented out rooms to the fashion students from the art college at that time.

I personally did not know any fashion students who lived in this particular house but it is a similar, although smaller version, of the Regency house on Prestbury Road I lived in prior to Grosvenor Terrace and through Laura contacting me on my blog I was able to provide her with photos, designs and some written memories of what a real life 1970’s fashion student’s bedroom might be like.

Not all the students on my course during the early seventies would have had a bedroom like this. When I first arrived in Cheltenham I lived in a boarding house providing bed, breakfast and an evening meal and the decoration resembled that of my parents house. Many students lived in such places and were comfortable with it being more home from home in appearance but I left half way through the first term as I wanted to experience real student life with no restrictive landlady and her rules, no matter how grotty the place I had to live in. The student house at 58 Prestbury Road did not disappoint and it certainly was grotty but it was all about the people – we were in some respects the original version of Friends.

Some of the key parts of this period had been carefully selected by Laura and her team; the orange bedspread (mine was similar – my mum’s old candlewick one so popular in the sixties and lasted well into the seventies), the cotton printed Indian bedspreads we used to cover up the old wallpapers most rentals had back then, the very graphic flower printed bedding and the mismatch all round.

Laura had assembled and printed a newspaper to hand out to visitors (see on the bed) that contained my written memories of life as a fashion student together with some of my photos of that time. I had surprisingly few photos and not of good quality as it was an expensive hobby back then to buy and develop film.

The wardobe above was so similar to the one I had in my room at both houses and the kimono dressing gown hung on the door was made from my very first printed length of fabric. We had to create a design that incorporated an element of pattern and would be printed in one colour and repeated.

Many of the sketches I did at the time were copied and pinned up around the room to give a little authenticity…

….but one of my favourite little touches was this blank sketchbook Laura had left for children to draw their own designs in. I remember this is how I started about age 8 just drawing lots of fashion ideas on any scrap of paper I could find not knowing back then that it would eventually lead to a whole career.

This beautiful quilt was hung on the wall, which I believe is on loan from the lady who made it and each of the patches is a genuine 1970’s fabric.

After we said our goodbyes we ventured off to test more of our memory skills. It wasn’t hard to spot 58 Prestbury Road – looking far more elegant than it did when we lived there. After having a small bedroom on the little half landing I eventually moved up into the attic bedroom that is the little tower you can see at the back of the house.

The attic stairs were the only ones to have any carpet – a traditional patterned red one and I rushed out and bought some carpet cleaner to bring it back to an almost new state. I was quite proud of that stair carpet it was the only piece of beauty in the whole place and it was only when one of the students had their mum visiting that we washed the kitchen floor and found the lino actually had a pattern!

We soon noticed that the road was tree lined now – so that was a surprise, but the bus stop and the bench just outside the house was missing.

The little shop I worked in for a while across the road is still going strong.

Of course we couldn’t leave Cheltenham without a day exploring the Promenade, where you find a host of the more expensive chains like The White Company, Hobbs, Anthropologie (need I go on!). I was so focused on the shops I didn’t even get a good picture.

The Promenade leads to the Imperial Gardens and eventually to Montpellier gardens…

…and Montpellier itself where there is a cluster of more individual even more expensive shops with beautiful window displays reminiscent of our time in Vicenza.

It was quite unexpected that there would be a shoe repair shop in amongst them but this is no Timpsons – rather I think he would be mending only shoes that have been handmade in the first place.

They also boast a branch of ‘The Ivy’ although expensive, not as eye watering as I thought it would be….but no we didn’t have a meal there – I just took a charming little picture.

By Wednesday I had walked further than my feet could cope with so we had to limit ourselves to allow for recovery. The day did not start well anyway with an early morning call from my mum in a panic which was not very coherent and by 10.30am I had another call from her carer saying mum had blacked out for a while and she had called the paramedics who were with her at the time and she was refusing to go to hospital. They had not been able to contact my sister, but the paramedics were very good and rang round to try and get her GP to come out (no chance on that one) or a nurse. A nurse came and took blood and eventually a urine sample and my sister finally arrived. So the day was interspersed with phone calls and not knowing if we might have to pack up and go home and sort mum out!

We decided to go out to Pittville Park while waiting for further news and took a flask of soup for lunch and sat by the lakeside to calm ourselves and watch the ducks and the heron.

Afterwards, we walked up to the Pump Rooms and out onto Albert Road. At the top of this road was the Art College and the fashion block – but all is long gone and has been replaced by the student accommodation village. The bus stop near the corner has also gone – it was here one night after college when I waited for the bus down into town that one of the royal cars came around the corner from the nearby race course and slowed down as it passed me and there was the Queen Mother waving from the back seat. I turned round to see who she was waving at but then realised it was me as I was completely on my own. Shame she didn’t offer me a lift!

We decided on the Art Gallery / Museum on Thursday where there are some wonderful William Morris treasures (which is another post another day) and all too soon Friday, the last day, arrived and before heading home we met up with my sister-in-law and her husband who had popped over from Oxford to Winchcombe for a hot chocolate in the Old Bakery and a catch up. Winchcombe is a delightful Cotswold market town heaving with history and those wonderful mellow stone cottages.

It was a delightful end to our visit.

Before we even arrived home we had a call from daughter No. 2 to provide some childcare the next day with an overnight stay at grannies for Little L and Sweetie.

Mum recovered and is awaiting our next visit this week.

Life is soon back to normal!

Back soon x

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dear diary ~ the sound of emptiness

I felt an overriding sense of sadness yesterday knowing that the grandchildren are now in school and my house is so very, very quiet. No little voices saying ‘granny can I……’

Over the summer months I have felt like I have been living in Legoland whilst every flat surface has been claimed to display one or other of the Lego sets that once belonged to my two daughters. I had the good sense to squirrel them away in the loft when they left home for such an occasion as having grandchildren. We have the airport, police station, fire station, restaurant, riding school, hospital and chalet and the grandchildren have just loved building each one with some expert help from grandad the architect.

Over the last 2 or 3 weeks we also introduced them to the fun of a nature walk, gathering blackberries to make crumbles and searching out bits and pieces for granny’s nature table – swapping out the beach pebbles and shells for pine cones and sycamore keys and discovering magical things like skeleton leaves. I especially love displaying our autumn finds with the earthy colours and lots of textures. I didn’t have time to glycerine the leaves though so they will soon shrivel and crumble away, but no matter part of the fun was in finding them. I am watching the laden Spanish conker tree that is overhanging the wall in someone’s front garden on the way to the village and waiting patiently for the first ones to fall onto the pavement.

I am already missing the energy that they bring to the house but Sweetie left me with this lovely picture she made to cheer me up.

Yesterday morning we deposited DH’s car at the garage and then went to Sainsbury’s for some food. We each have a trolley and do a scan shop so that we can take advantage of all the smart shop reductions, the general nectar reductions and the nectar points, but it is hard work co-ordinating everything. Often for the same item DH will be given more points than me or vice versa, so of course we use the nectar card that will provide the better reward. Being as frugal as possible takes a good deal of time.

When we arrived home on Saturday we had very little in the fridge and no fresh fruit and veg but luckily the pantry is well stocked with tinned and dry goods and we had bread and a pizza in the freezer. It is good to see the fruit dish full again and although I have a few tomatoes ripening in the garden (I bought Totem patio variety again this year and mine are the assortment of sizes below) we needed to buy extra so we can make soup. This week the large Jubilee variety were on offer – excellent for tomato soup and DH got points for the cherry vine ones.

I often make ice lollies to keep in the freezer from cartons of juice for the grandchildren and these packets of Cawston pressed fruit caught my eye – no added sugar or sweeteners and of course so much cheaper than buying lollies.

Sainsbury’s is currently having a sale on homewares and electricals. I am now on the lookout for little Christmas presents and these two items caught my eye. I think I might make up a little basket of a bottle of homemade drink and some nibbles to go with these little wooden coasters and I will make table mats with the tea towels. The coasters were reduced from £8. to £5.33 and the tea towels £6.50 reduced to £4.33.

Looking through the old photos for yesterday’s post I came across this one from 1966 which made me smile. I mentioned in recent posts that I am always left pushing the pram when we go out with the family (I love it of course) and this picture shows me in training when my younger sister was born. This is certainly a vintage pushchair haven’t they changed so much over the years? This one no doubt would have been second hand like the cot – people didn’t often buy new in those days.

I would have just finished my first year at grammar school when this was taken so would be about twelve and my dad had bought me my first sewing machine a year before because I was mad keen on sewing. Mum of course would have knitted the cardigans. I cannot believe how young she looks here. I remember making my sister’s little dress from this pattern – I think my gran made mine (she was a tailoress by trade and started me sewing at age 6) – the A line and shift styles were so easy to make I was soon making my own dresses and a few tunic tops for my mum and a neighbour.

Not only does the house seem empty but I too feel empty – I didn’t sleep well last night as my mum is constantly on my mind. The social worker had another meeting with her and the home care carers yesterday and of course being so far away I couldn’t attend. Although the social worker said she would ring and update me afterwards it was perhaps too much to hope she would contact me straight away. I am concerned that she has got everything in place for mum to go home next Monday and that she has rung to check that the lift is now working in the apartment block where she lives as it has been out of order many times recently.

Since all this started with mum’s fall back in May I have had to keep notes of every conversation that I have and jot down who with on what date at what time. It is exhausting. I feel like I am always chasing and complaining and that isn’t who I am and it is making me feel like I am a bad person. It appears unless you get a bit stroppy nothing gets done.

I think there are many people going through the same issues with the care system. It is not until you are involved that you realise how complex and useless it is. I am so worried now about DH and I becomming ill and what our daughter’s might be up against in the future as we age (which inevitably we will do). Something needs to be done but who is going to listen?

It was quite heavy rain yesterday and much cooler, quite refreshing really and the dry borders will be well soaked. To help cheer me up DH made a hearty leek and lentil stew for our evening meal which we had with a crusty roll – proper comfort food.

Oh well…… here’s to a better day today. x