The Joy of Giving
This is quite an appropriate time to talk about giving and it is done in memory of my dear friend K. It was her funeral yesterday and a lovely celebration of her life.
No-one could have had a better friend; even with the 20 year age gap we got on so well. What made K so special was that she was a true giver, she never expected anything from me and she would ring just to see how I was (ironic when she was so ill herself). She was always there with a warm welcome and ready to give you a cup of tea and piece of cake whenever you called. She had an equally wonderful way of saying goodbye as you left with a hug, a lot of thank yous for calling and then would wave you off from her steps outside her door, never going inside until you were out of sight. She made you feel special.
Knowing she was terminally ill and not much time left she had organised her funeral in advance and started to get her affairs in order to lessen the burden on her family afterwards. One of the most touching things, and I have a tear or two as I write this, was that the day before she became unresponsive she had made her daughter promise to get the Christmas present she had intended to get for me and it sits in the envelope beside me with a card.
Her daughter said it is a little thank you for the help we gave her since her partner died last year. DH and I gladly helped her. Her eldest son gave a fitting tribute and she had left little individual thank you messages to be read out acknowledging each of her children and her wider family for their love, help and support that they had given her throughout this difficult year. How lovely was that. She gave her love and appreciation to everyone, even at the very end of her life.
I am missing her so much….just the little things like when one of her favourite programs comes on the TV ( we both had a love of watching dear Robbie on his canal boat expeditions) or when I am in Sainsbury’s and I don’t bump into her halfway down an aisle all the way round the store, or like yesterday when we called at the local garden centre and I saw the poster for their Afternoon Tea which K and I thoroughly enjoyed for Christmas and her birthday.
So in memory of K I gave to the charity of her choice the Scottish Air Ambulance Endowment Fund. She was always grateful for their help when she needed it on holiday in Scotland and had to be flown to a hospital in an emergency.
As readers will know in past years I always try and make a few items for the craft stall at the coffee morning in our local church it is largely a gift of time on my part making something that will sell without spending a great deal on materials. This year I made these little bags of Christmas. The transfers for the candles, the bags, the chocolates and the oranges were quite inexpensive and all I had to buy, the rest of the bits and pieces including the candles I already had in my Christmas stash waiting to be made into something sellable.
It was a busy morning despite the wet weather and I was able to catch up with old friends over a cup of tea and a cake. They managed to raise £5,000 for the Crisis charity who will make sure as many homeless people as possible have a Christmas dinner on Christmas day.
Giving is so important and as K showed everyone by her actions, giving is not just about giving money. So although I give to my favourite charities at Christmas before I embark on my Christmas shopping I will take a leaf out of K’s book and give in other small ways too with a welcoming guesture like she would….a smile, a few words an acknowledgement to anyone that passes by.
Christmas is for giving…so like my friend I will give joyously from the heart. X
wherethejourneytakesme2.blog 
Your thoughtfulness and generosity is a shining light in a dark time. This Christmas will be bittersweet as you remember your dear friend – but may the good memories of a lovely person be a comfort to you and all her friends and family. Thrilled to read of the money raised for Crisis at your Church event too. Well done!!
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We had a good turnout. I could have sold more of my little bags if I had time to make them. My fingertips are still numb from pushing stubborn cloves into the oranges!
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Your friend K sounds lovely, and so thoughtful of her when she was obviously so poorly to think of everyone who had helped her. I have just finished writing my Christmas cards and bought my stamps, £26 worth! I haven’t written so many this year and am quite proud that I haven’t had to buy any new this year as found loads in the drawer of doom under the bed. Put them all in a box in one place now. Granddaughter’s presents bought, but daughter has as yet given me any ideas.
Take care. Gill Xx
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I spent the same on my stamps! I am sending my email in so.e cards this year to people I never see anymore to say that this will be the last year I send them a card but if they give me their email I will still send a greetings online. The money saved I will give to charity and the people I do see I will still give a card to. Royal Mail should ideally do a cheaper stamp for the Christmas period otherwise sending cards will die out like postcards have. X
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That’s a lovely idea to give to your friend’s favourite charity in her memory. I’m sure she’ll be smiling in Heaven about that. The things you made for the Christmas fair were lovely. It’s good that they raised so much money to make homeless peoples’ Christmas a good one. Unfortunately, I’m struggling to give much to charity this year, whilst not having much of an income. I may try to give something to the Food Bank if I can at some point this month. I’d like to do more, but I’m struggling to balance the budget at the moment. I may do a pantry clear out and donate some of the things we are not using, so long as they’re in date. It’s better than nothing.
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Don’t forget that you have contributed to the charities by means of your shopping all year in the charity shops. We each do what we can in our own way.
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Sorry, that was johnnyjumps up.
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This is a beautiful post. And K sounds like a wonderful person.
True friendship is a blessing.
Jules. Xx
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Thank you Jules, she was a treasure and although we met by accident she certainly enriched my life. It is going to be hard without her. x
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This has hurt my heart but in a good way. What a wonderful friend. This post reminds me of the old Eleanor Farjeon poem:
How will you your Christmas keep?
Feasting, fasting or asleep?
Will you laugh or will you pray,
Or will you forget the day?
Be it kept with joy or pray’r,
Keep of either some to spare;
Whatsoever brings the day,
Do not keep but give away.
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The above was Joy, by the way . . . and this. xx
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Thank you Joy, I know you and many other bloggers will be feeling the same on Christmas day and thinking of our loved ones that are no longer with us. xx
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What a beautiful poem and thank you for leaving this in the comments for me. I will be enjoying the day with all my family together this year, but will no doubt have many moments remembering K and my own lovely dad, both will be missed dearly.
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What a lovely lady and friend K was to you and all those who were blessed to have known her. I am sorry for your loss but know that you have many precious memories of your time together. Thank you for the reminder about giving, and that it doesn’t always have to be something big and expensive to be valued by those who receive it. A smile and kind word is a gift too.
Beverley (from Back2oursmallcorner)
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K taught me an awful lot in the time I have known her. She had a wonderful take on life and people and was definitely a glass half full person.
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Kindness is catching! You and K were kind to each other and it seems both of you are / were generous to those around you. I am sure it means that you also receive kindness and support.
Sue
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K is yet another of my special friends to pass away…I do miss them all dearly. I am wondering who might accidentally venture into my life next.
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I go to far too many funerals these days because many of my friends are older like me. But I have every intention of making new ones!
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